...that I missed the day before...I really didn't have anything I wanted to say. I spent some of the day pissed and some of it elated...but just didn't really wanna talk about it. I need to figure out if this living with mom thing is really gonna work out or if we are going to have to come to some sort of crazy compromise...I've wanted to live by myself since I moved out of GT housing, but this crap out here is expensive. I'm really hoping that mom will find out how much she will have for housing soon, and I can hopefully (somehow, PLEASE GOD) find a place with like a mother-in-law suite or a separate entrance and living area(and garage, and washer and dryer hookup, and a good amount of space somewhere for storage) I can make my habitat. I really liked the fact that I had grown up, but I need to be able to live like a grown up. I do plan on getting a job (TOMORROW if possible) so I can support myself, but I know that mom still needs help, and I don't mind helping her...I just don't think I should co-habitate with her. So having my own living area in a big enough house would be awesome (and the way we look for places it is possible). It would be *really* nice if they just gave her twice what they do now for housing...but I'm pretty sure they wont...*sigh*. Hopefully we'll find out soon.
I did try and go get a Grady card too, but my appointment is for....*drumroll*...May. W.T.F. They said I could call at the end of the month and try to get squeezed in somewhere else, but I dunno about that. I think I might try and go back to the Grady clinic I used to go to and see what they say. I think I'm also gonna call and see what the difference between a new patient and one who went to a different clinic and stopped for a while is too...that'll probably help. Its sad I have to go through all of this for (possible) allergy tests and to figure out what's wrong with my stomach...but I really want to get those things done. I don't completely mind eating yogurt or taking allergy meds everyday, but I wont if I don't have to. And I wont have to if I can get the problems fixed for free.
So I really am considering locs. Right now. I have a relaxer kit *in my possession*, and I don't even know if I want to use it. I REALLY want to scratch my scalp right now...and I know I can do that if I didn't have to think about putting a relaxer in my head. I could go out in whatever weather...scratch to my heart's content (which doesn't even itch as much), wash it whenever I wanted to...I am SO leaning towards getting braids to grow the mess back out again before cutting it...you know, I think I might let the relaxer be the deciding factor...if I can find the receipt, AND it's returnable...I just may go ahead and go for it again. I really did LOVE my natural hair...it was soft and big, and it was soooo easy...but I didn't feel sexy with it (mostly because I didn't have the ability to put it in my face like I normally do) and I still liked the idea of a comb. I think I may be secure enough in myself (now) so that I can feel sexy whenever and just go for it. I'll have to make sure I'm no longer in love with my comb though before I go for the locs, but I know if I had them, I'd be able to swoop it in my face again....*sigh*....conundrum. Seriously though, I am going to look for that receipt...tonight...
"We are the champions, my friend/and we'll keep on fighting to the end..."
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